How I Healed Eczema and Found My Passion
What I learned during my two year journey with anxiety and burnout as a new mom to healing my body, mastering my energy, and reigniting my creativity.
Are you wondering why nothing's working to heal your health issues?
I thought I was on top of things with food sensitivity testing, elimination diets, acupuncture and more. Still nothing worked to heal the eczema on my hands and wrists. What I learned about real healing was nothing I'd heard in a doctor's office. By sharing my story, I hope you'll find the missing piece to your healing too.
Read on to discover the fascinating link between childhood and inherited trauma, my health issues and how I healed permanently.
When it All Started
It all began when I returned to work after having my first child. I was juggling motherhood and a full-time career. I was bored at work as a massage therapist because it felt repetitive and restrictive. I started experiencing anxiety, eczema, and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS).
I felt overwhelmed and numb and I didn’t know who I was anymore.
There was a growing restlessness that I ignored by binging on Netflix. I felt trapped and yet I felt guilt every time I wanted to be alone. I had a loving family and a steady career. How could this add up to me feeling unfulfilled?
On top of all this I had developed an irrational fear that I'd be a single mom and was mentally preparing that my husband would die and I’d be completely helpless.
I ignored change so life threw change at me.
My health symptoms worsened. My eczema was spreading around my wrists and hands and my stomach would cramp as my daughter woke up throughout the night. I tried an elimination diet after testing positive for a long list of food sensitivities but it did little so I gave it up after two months.
I was frustrated and betrayed by my body. I couldn't accept this broken version of me.
I Followed the Breadcrumbs to Healing.
One day my husband brought home a book called Many Lives, Many Masters. It was about a Harvard psychiatrist that stumbled on the concept of repeating life lessons and past lives with his clients.
Reading it reunited me with a forgotten part of myself—my soul.
That same week I found myself in a bookstore getting an intuitive reading for the first time. I was so scared but something compelled me to see this medium. She revealed how intuitive I really was and that I was meant to be in service to others in a deeper way.
"You're a healer, and you're going to be really good at it." Really, me?
I walked in nervous and I left hopeful that the universe had some big plans for me, though I didn’t understand how to piece it together.
Soon After I Discovered Bio-energy Healing.
Bio-energy healing is a gentle, non-invasive treatment where the practitioner uses various hand movements to remove stagnant energy from the body's electromagnetic field to improve energy flow and self healing.
I was drawn to metaphysical stuff since my early twenties but left it all when I started massage therapy school. I waited an entire year to experience my first session because I felt guilty spending the money on myself.
At that session I felt self-love for the first time since becoming a mom and I cried the whole time for the freedom I had lost. I ended up doing the full training in Costa Rica because of how deeply it touched me.
The sessions focus on balancing the seven main energy centers corresponding with the major areas of the nervous system. To me it feels like we're working directly in the subconscious, transforming pent up charges in the nervous system.
The changes in my life happened over the months that followed my training, which included healing from eczema, embracing my intuitive gifts and a completely different birth experience with my second-born (I had a natural birth after c-section).
I Was Introduced to Muscle Testing Around the Same Time
Muscle testing is a technique that taps into the subconscious through the neuromuscular system. We can ask the subconscious mind questions and get an answer through the body.
While there's many ways to muscle test, I love The Emotion Code protocol by Dr. Bradley Nelson. It's a simple way to identify and release trapped emotions.
What I learned was eye-opening. There were layers of emotions from both my childhood and my ancestors. The feelings were running in the background of my entire life and I had no idea until now.
Feelings like helplessness, despair, feeling unsupported, grief... it explained why I always wanted to be in control and needed constant certainty about the future. Deep down there were times in my early life I felt completely helpless and I was still living in that world view.
I learned to heal one emotion at a time and slowly let go of the old patterns that were triggered by motherhood. My anxiety eventually replaced with trust in the process.
Update: I now also use PSYCH-K® which is a muscle testing framework to shift beliefs, transform stress, and discover hidden messages. I was blown away by how playful, empowering, and simple the process is that I’m now a PSYCH-K® facilitator.
I Learned How to Decode the Sensations in My Body
Somatic awareness is about cultivating awareness in and around our body. By focusing on and amplifying the sensations in our body we can release pent up energy in our nervous system and heal past trauma.
I came across a medical intuition book that encouraged me to use all my senses and trust the flow of information. I practiced connecting with the eczema by saying hello to it and asking what its message was. The key was to be open and receptive to whatever showed up, especially in the form of thoughts, images, movement, emotions and sensations (TIMES).
Initially I felt trapped like I was fighting to get free of something and shaking my head in despair. I didn't understand it at first but it soon became clear.
My Body's Reminder of Childhood Trauma
It wasn't until talking to a friend that I had a huge revelation. The eczema looked like handcuffs around my wrists. I shockingly realized it was exactly where my wrists were strapped to a gurney as a baby going in for heart surgery. My parents painfully remembered me crying and fighting to get free. I literally felt "handcuffed" at work and at home as a new parent. I missed my freedom immensely.
I finally opened up about a secret I'd kept for almost 30 years.
I experienced childhood sexual trauma but had always denied it until one day in the middle of my Bio-energy training it hit me like a cement brick. It took me months to unravel the layers of emotions that came with it. Anger, shame, helplessness, lack of control... these were the same feelings that came up when I tuned into the eczema.
The day I finally had the courage and self-respect to tell my mom what happened the eczema vanished overnight after two years of it mysteriously appearing.
Uncovering Ancestral Trauma
My grandmother lost her husband suddenly during a storm and his body was never found. She was left with four kids and a sudden financial responsibility. It coincided with my irrational fear of losing my husband once I became a working mom and the start of my health symptoms.
This helped me piece together a puzzle that nobody else saw: I was repeating my family’s trauma of helplessness and vulnerability and I was ready to break the cycle.
Each time I replayed the memory of being strapped on the gurney I only felt my own helplessness. Later I realized my parents felt the same emotions looking back at me.
12 questions to find the missing link to inherited trauma (coming soon)
Creating The Spacious Breath
As a massage therapist and wellness facilitator, I've witnessed how the body holds the layers of our experiences. My mission is to guide you in connecting with your body's innate wisdom.
I combine my favourite tools to help burnt-out caregivers and space holders release stress so they can thrive at work and at home.
So that's a wrap on how I healed from eczema and found my purpose. In reality, eczema healed me. Without it I would've never gone on the quest to heal and be here to share what worked and didn't work for me.
Ready to try something new?
If you’re interested in feeling lighter, understanding your body and gaining insight on how you can better thrive, Margaret offers healing sessions in-person and online. Leave with clarity, lightness and action steps to help you on your wellness journey.
